I had stayed up all night last night with the idea in mind of getting to the hospital early and get this blood drawing over with. I still had to get a chest xray and a shot to prevent shingles zostor. Apparently this is nasty little rash that seems to come on people over 60 and I'm told they are quite ugly, itchy and painful.  They look like chichen pox.  So, I got that vaccination.  Ten I walked to the laboratory where they had to take my blood and my pee for testing to see it it was ok and if I was ok for surgery.   I'm usually a very difficult needle stick and have been ever since I got the Chemo in 1994. I think they exploded all the veins in the bend of my arm.  I always dead these blood daws because they are so hard.  Today, I stated slapping and rubbing my arm as soon as I sat down and I explained to the tech that he wouldn't be about to get any blood out of the bend in my arm and so he stated looking other places.  the heavens smiled on me....he got the needle in at his first attempt and I didn't even feel it. I think we should make this guy a doctor right on the spot.

I had to pee in a cup and then I was sent on my way.  By the time I had walked to these 3 clinics using just a cane, my knees were feeling very stiff and I was having to stop and rest probably about every 10 to 15 feet and sit down and rest.  I can go much faster with the can than I can with the walker, so if there are places for me to sit down occasionally, I prefer the cane.

The bad news is that once I got to my car.  My left leg was completely stiff. It would not bend at all.  I had to get behind the drivers seat and the seat was pushed back as far as it would go and it just wouldn't fit.  I had to relax the leg and slowly manually put it in the car.  I was in quite a bit of pain too.   Both knees were aching.  I had hoped to go by target and use one of their electric wheelchairs and do some browsing (I need birthday wrapping paper) but I was in too much pain. I coudn't do it. I was probably very comical watching me get into the house from the car.  I was bent over like a 150 year old person and taking tiny tiny steps.   I was in bad shape.

I took the dogs and crawled up stairs and laid across the bed.  It is 12:30  pm by now.  I went fast asleep and didnt wake up until I heard Maxie come home about 9 pm.  I got up and my knees felt much better...they needed that rest.

Mlou has been sick for the past several months.  Not enough to keep her home and she still goes out with  Roy and does the things that they do, but she says she just isn't feeling well.  She seems to have lost her appetite and has a general feeling of nausea.  She is 74 so it is something she needs to see a dr about.  I told her the symptons sound an awful lot like my symptoms when I had my gall bladder out in 1997.  Well, finally today she went to the dr. and he suspects it is the gall bladder too. They are going to do some tests this week.  She has lost 10 lbs because ever since these symptoms started she hasn't felt like eating.  I hope it  is something easily curable like the gall bladder.  Something else could be more serious and that's no fun at all.

I've been talking to my nephew Harry.  He is a doctor and he has told me some things to expect and some things to look for.  I like having a doctor in the family.  He is so smart and has been very helpful with  medical questions we have had through the years. I wish we lived closer. He is in San Diego.  John and I are talking about moving to Orange County once he quits work for good if our children are both still in Los Angeles by then.

Since I named this blog...MY EXPERIENCE WITH BILATERAL KNEE REPLACEMENT, one would think that I'd start writing about the surgery to my knees. I still have a few weeks before that actually happens so there's not much else I can write about that until it happens. I can tell you something that is a royal pain in the ass.  You know how we always cross our legs at the knees? Well, it is a habit that is very difficult to break. I KNOW that every time I do it, I have trouble and lots of pain getting them uncrossed.  However, I still forget and do it all the time. I can't uncross them without literally lifting one leg off the other.  This is something that I hope will be fixed with the new knees.

I am going to have one adventure before the surgery.  Jenny is Directing her first full length play in Los Angeles and I just can't miss that. I know I will have to be in the wheel chair the entire trip, but Jeff will be on spring break and he has volunteered to help me get around.  I will be going to Los Angeles the 2nd week of April.  I hadn't planned on going because I knew how much trouble I would be.  However, there will only be ONE first time for Jenny and I don't want to miss that.  She had actually directed several things before, but they were college projects and one act plays.  This is more of the "big time".   

I want to do so much. I have always been such an independent person. I hate to rely on others to do things for me.  But now I can't go shopping, I can't just browse around because just getting to the car and in and out is so painful.  I daydream about all of this being over and being on the road to recovery.  I know I'll never walk like a person with perfectly healthy legs, because I will always have the ankle problems and the back problems.  All I ask is to just be able to walk as well as I could 6 or 7 years ago. 

John left today for Kasakstan.  I wonder if that is actually how you spell it?? So, he will be gone a few days.  I think this could be his last trip before the surgery. Not really sure. 

Things are going downhill fast for me.  I really wanted to go get my bloodwork and chest xray today.  But somehow, I couldn't manage to even get out of bed.  My knees were bothering me so bad, it just wasnt' worth getting up.  The reason for this is because I was out and about yesterday. I didn't do much walking at all.  However, I was in my wheelchair and I did a lot of "crabwalking" in my chair.  Of course, I have to use my legs for this.  I used to "walk" around like this all the time and it never bothered me at all.  But today I'm paying for that little activity!!  As each day passes, I'm more and more ready to get this surgery done with.  I want to begin the rehab process.

I've also been doing all the daily exercises that are supposed to help me after the surgery.  But, the ones using my knees only make them hurt more.  I feed trapped here at home.  I'm so glad I decided to get both knees done at the same time.  I'm counting down the days.

I am truly a night owl.  Since the children left home it has gotten worse and worse. My hours are terrible.  Also, for about the past 6 months (since my knees have gotten so very bad) I usually sleep during the day and stay up all night long either on the computer or watching tv and recently reading.   What usually happens is that I go to bed sometime in the morning and then get up at about 4 or 5 pm,  just in time to make some dinner for John.  Since I can't go shopping anymore, what is the fun of being awake during the day?  

I see that I have one follower so far.  Thanks Rollerfink!! This guy is a friend of my son's and although I've never met him, he seems like the nicest guy you'd ever want to meet. He has the most adorable little girl about 2, maybe 3 and a newborn son.  He is from Australia but lives in Hawaii now. I hope to meet him someday.   I think he will find my blog pretty darn boring, but I'm happy he's reading.

Jeff is a wonderful writer.  When he was in college, he met a bunch of guys through some writing website and they all wrote a script together and in the process they became great friends and Rollerfink is one of those guys.   When Jeff went out to Los Angeles he roomed with a couple of them.  I think they all had great aspirations of becoming famous screenwriters.  Jeff got a pretty good job and worked for a few years and then decided he wasn't happy with things he was doing, and decided to go back to school and get his Master's in History and continue on and get his Phd.  He wants to ultimately teach college History.   He will soon be finished with his Master's from California State University at Northridge.  He received a scholarship from Cal State and also a Fellowship.  He is currently student teaching 2 classes and working on his Thesis.

Jenny graduated from Emerson College in Boston, where she majored in Theater, with an emphasis on Directing.  She has worked at several theaters and is a member of  the BRIMMER STREET THEATER COMPANY.   She is Directing a play this spring in Los Angeles.  While doing this, she is also very busy working full time at UCLA.  She also has plans to get her Master's.

Lastly, since I'm telling you about my family...is John.  We have been married almost 33 years and most of those years, John was in the Navy.  He was a Ltjg when we met and spent 31 years in the submarine service.  He retired from the Navy in 2003 as a Rear Admiral.  He works full time with the Department of Defense.  More about him later...  

Today I'm setting up all of my pre-op appointments. I have to get a chest x-ray, lab work, an EKG and I have to talk to the Internal Meds doctor and a social worker.  I'm not so nervous about things yet.  I'm reading a very interesting book about Total Knee Replacement and Rehab and it is very informative.  I've started all the pre-op exercises and WOW...am I out of shape!!

Some days, I worry about the fact that I still have pain in my ankles and I wonder how much improvement I will get from this bilateral knee replacement.  Then I will have an errand to run or something to do that keeps me on my feet and I start feeling the intense pain and stiffness in my knees, and then I know it is the right thing to do.

After the accident in 1972 and all the surgeries, I could get around pretty well. I didn't need a cane or anything for assistance and I was able to have 2 wonderful pregnancies with no complications.   My left leg had been in a cast for 15 months after the surgery because I had a very large section of bone in my left tibia that had "died" due to an overwhelming infection.  I had to have a bone graft in late 1973.  I had also had surgery to fuse my right ankle.  The left ankle fused itself from being in the cast so long.   Then around 1998 I joined a gym and started working out regularly.  Part of the workout was moving my ankles as much as I could on certain equipment.  Much to my surprise, I regained a good bit of motion in BOTH of my ankles.  This was definitely not a good thing.  With the movement, came severe arthritis...thus the surgery in 1999 to insert screws in my right ankle and refuse it and then in 2001, I had the same thing done to the left ankle.   I guess it is a wonder I'm still walking at all.

My first attempt at Blogging....3/24/2009

I'm setting up this blog in order to let anyone who is interested...know how things are going with me and my bilateral total knee replacement.  Today is March 24th, 2009 and my surgery is scheduled for April 23rd.

I suppose along the way, I'll venture off the subject and tell you things about myself or my children or my dogs.  I don't expect anyone to really be interested in this unless you know me or love me.  I live in Virginia and both of my kids live in Los Angeles.  They are both successful adults. My son is 29 years old, and his name is Jeff and my daughter is 26 years old and her name is Jenny.  I'm sure I will refer to both of them a lot as time goes on.

I think writing a blog is very helpful, not just right now, but years from now, if I have something to look back and and read then I can remember it all and I won't have false memories of how it was.   We all do that.  No one ever remembers everything about any experience that they have.   And if 2 people have the exact same experience, neither one of them will remember it exactly the same.

When I was younger, I kept a diary.  I would go back and read it and relive a lot of happy memories and it would help me remember some of the bad times that I had actually forgotten.

I think it is good to remember everything.

I am 64 years old now.  I have a wonderful and loving husband and I consider myself one of the luckiest people in the world.  I am a positive thinker and try to find good in just about everything that happens to me.  I've had plenty of bad things to happen but somehow, I always found a silver lining.

When I had a 2 year old, and was pregnant with my daughter, my mother lived with me and my husband.  She was bed ridden and quite feeble.  I loved my mother truly and deeply and I thought she was the best mother ever.  But at that time in my life, I was overwhelmed with caring for her and my young family.  I knew I couldn't continue taking care of her.  I knew she was going to have to go live somewhere else.  She could have gone to live with my brother or one of my sisters, they all wanted her.  But she saw the burden she had become for me and didn't want that.  Luckily, my niece and her husband (her granddaughter) owned several nursing homes in Alabama.  We were living in Virginia at the time and it just seemed like the right solution because my niece said mom could live there free and keep her pension checks. It was truly a blessing.  However, it was a very sad time too...because I felt like I was letting my dear mother down.  She was incontentent and completely bed ridden and I knew I had no choice.  She agreed to the move but I knew I would always feel badly about it. So, I decided to start keeping a diary of my every day experiences taking care of her.  I did this faithfully for about 3 months before she left. I started it when I was about 6 months along with Jenny.  We had all decided that mom would stay until the baby was born.  My sister, Bonnie, came to stay with us the last month of my pregnancy, and during that first month of Jenny's life.  She would accompany my mother to Alabama and the nursing home.  She was a Godsend for me.

Every time I would miss my mother, I would go to Diary and read what I had written, and remember how hard it was on a day to day basis.  I am ashamed of some of the things I wrote because I was so frustrated with trying to do it all.  But reading that Diary made me know for sure that I had done the only thing I could do.  I'm so happy that I kept that Diary.  I haven't seen it in years, but I know it is somewhere around here. I don't need to read it anymore.  My mom lived for another 2 years and 8 months at the nursing home.  I went to see her every 3 months and talked to her on the telephone just about every day.  I knew she was in the best place for her.  But to this day, I miss her.

So, back to present day.  I have had problems with my feet and legs since July 4, 1972 when I was in a very bad automobile accident.  Both of my ankles were crushed.  I won't go into any of the boring details now (maybe later).  Suffice it to say, that I spent the next 4 years in and out of the hospital with numerous surgeries and bad legs.  I didn't lose the ability to walk, but I've always been in pain.  It was mostly my ankles.  My last surgery on my ankles was one in 1999 and the other one in 2001.  They were both fused because of the very painful arthritis, caused by the accident.  The surgeries relieved a lot of the pain, but I still don't have great ankles.

I suppose it was because of the stress on my knees, who knows, but shortly after this my knees started bothering me and it has steadily gotten worse and worse.  Now I am at the point where I can't walk more than a few yards without both knees stiffening and causing pain. I use a walker or wheelchair most of the time.   Finally, 2 years ago, I went to the orthopedic surgeon with cries for help.  He referred me to a pain management clinic.  I have been seen by them for the past 2 years.  I have been taking NSAID's of all kinds. I have had steroid injections which did absolutely nothing and I have had 4 courses of Synvisc.  This is also a knee injection that is done 3 times over a 3 week period every 6 months.  They inject this thick slimy gunk in my knee joint to replace lost cartilage.  This gave me a lot of nightly relief but really hasn't helped with my walking.  Finally, last month I returned  to the same orthopedic surgeon and he said it is time for the bilateral knee replacement.  Both knees at the same time.  Since them I have been reading all that I can find on what to expect and the rehabilitation process.  I'm ready for this surgery.